Revise/clarify the "drug talk" rule

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Revise/clarify the "drug talk" rule Empty Revise/clarify the "drug talk" rule

Post by Free Melly on Sat Nov 02, 2019 4:55 am

Hey y'all,

I don't mean to bring up a hot topic, if it is one.
I've been a member of this cc for a bit, and I understand a lot of the rationing behind the "no drug talk" rule.

I had a big issue tonight where a few cc members went after me (while I was on my obby mauler) for "drug talk".  I mentioned that I'm tired of checking facebook and seeing another friend's page memorialized from an OD.  I posted in the CC, before getting a response, just asking that if anyone has a problem with drugs, to please reach out.  Is that completely appropriate to bring up in the CC?  No it isn't -- don't get me wrong.  I've been down since then, but the last thing I expected was to be able to vent and be hit with "no drug talk in the cc".

Really?  I know (and support) that the cc isn't about glorifying or talking about drugs in general, but come on...


EDIT: Shoutout the few cc members who hit me up and talked it out, despite the roasts from the majority. Y'all the real ones.
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Post by Syllabic on Sat Nov 02, 2019 6:38 am

While I'm not sure that it's my place to say what the rules should or should not be, I appreciate you bringing this up. It's important to make it known when things like this are bothering you. I say that as someone that's notorious for being super tight-lipped when it comes to personal stuff. The fact that you trusted the CC enough to bring up an issue like that is wonderful to hear. The fact that your response was less than what you expected, is not.

Again, I apologize for not saying anything sooner. I do think that people are sometimes overzealous when it comes to informing people of/enforcing certain rules. That's far from a dig at the mod team, by the way. Most of it, in my experience, seems to come from regular members like myself rather than the higher ranking clannies. Perhaps, then, that does indicate that the rule needs to be a bit clearer (or perhaps narrower in scope), as it seems as if some of the subtlety is lost on many of us.

That's just my two cents, though. I'm curious to see what other people think.

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Post by ladybird2 on Sat Nov 02, 2019 7:14 am

Drugs are a big issue, the reason it is a rule not to discuss them in cc is that is does often cause drama and unwanted remarks. Whilst it is something that touches the lives of some it is by no means a part of all our lives apart from the negative connotations. I say negative...and that sort of remark would prompt conversations like 'what about for medical reasons',can we talk about 'x' 'y' 'z' what about tea and coffee what about …….and because we have no idea who is in cc it all escalates with varying opinions before eventually being 'shut down'. The fact that people responded with no drug talk, means that they are happy with the rule. It hit a raw nerve with you because it was a very personal and an unpleasant and tragic reality that you were mentioning, and I understand your frustration that you felt you got a hostile response for reaching out. We have times when people say things like ' ive been clean x amount of days/months/yrs' that will get a positive reply people are supportive, others who know where that person is coming from will take it to pm. Even I with no experience will pm someone to ask them if they are ok and say well done, it is what happens behind the scenes. We cant know who is on cc at any given time , (a child or person with their own issues), chat is meant to be recreational, the reaction you got from those who privately contacted you is everything I would expect from this clan and members, the no drug talk response was an attempt to uphold the rules, because it is hard to judge where it will lead, who will seek to troll, or if it will get out of hand.
You have highlighted that you fully understand why we have our rules, but felt that you were reaching out in troubled times and got hurt by the reaction, and what you reported is indeed tragic , my pm is always open and I feel sorry for your pain, I hope that those that did respond are now on your friends list for continued support. I don't see our rules changing any time soon they serve as a blanket one size fits all, which tho maybe not ideal works 9 times out of 10, unless there is any way we can tweak it, because its said before we know the whole story.
Thank you for your post in here, hopefully others will read it too.
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Post by runtellthat4 on Sat Nov 02, 2019 11:32 am

Our drug rule may at times seem strict but the problem has always been to where do we draw the line...anytime we made exceptions it was taken advantage of and pushed..So we simply made the rule "no drug talk"
Our moderators have some discretion in enforcement with our disclaimer...we pride ourselves in being tolerant...
In your case its just a matter of this being the wrong venue...
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Post by Mowp on Sat Nov 02, 2019 12:23 pm

I really appreciate you bringing this to the forums as too many times these types of discussions go on for far too long in the CC which is really not an appropriate place to discuss the rules. I think in cases like this where you're reaching out for support to the CC, you're better off saying something along the lines of "Could anyone PM me, I really need someone to talk to." Not only for issues which touch upon the boundaries of acceptable chat, but for anything that is especially personal, as a one-on-one experience is better in most scenarios like this. If you ever need someone to talk to, my PMs are always open, and I'm not the only one.

I hope you are coping ok with the situation and I empathise wholeheartedly. Most CC members probably feel the same way too, but I feel like with a lot of sensitive matters, openly discussing it in the CC is probably not going to yield the results you're looking for anyway.
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Revise/clarify the "drug talk" rule Empty Re: Revise/clarify the "drug talk" rule

Post by runtellthat4 on Mon Nov 11, 2019 2:55 pm

@ Free Melly....in the event of other members piling on you..this is also against our rules and should have been stopped by a CC Mod...It is why we have chat Moderators...
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